This is a short post to vent my anger on the quality of pills here in Malaysia. Every one of the miserable pills I have taken here have been crap. Words cannot describe the quality of the shit I've been getting. All of them have either been weak speed pills or more commonly K- bombs. I have not felt even a tingle of euphoria from these half assed excuses for ecstacy. I'm not asking for much. Just a decent MDMA pill or even a speed bomb will do. Maybe its just my luck as I've heard people getting really "high" on local bikkies. But then again, it could just be the k they're feeling. Oh well, i guess my raving days are numbered. 

Orange/ Pink @

 

Logo: @ taking up almost the entire face of the pill. Deep press.

Press: Firm hard pressed pill. Not crumbly.

Shape: Round. Single bevel on logo side. Domed on reverse. No score.

Color:  Salmon coloured, pinkish orangey.

Suspected contents: Ketamine (loads of it)

Location: Kuala Lumpur

 

Had this pill at a recent rave. Insufflated about half a pill. Started to feel the effects in about 5 mins. Heaviness at the back of my head coupled with loss of balance. Somewhat similar to being drunk. Slight nausea, but not enough to induce vomiting. No loving effects at all. Difficulty in depth perception. The more intense effects were gone in about half an hour. But the slight dizziness and nausea continued for another hour. After that I went to sleep. No problem sleeping at all. Woke up a few hours later. No obvious signs of comedown.

 

I suspect ketamine to be the main ingredient in this bikkie as I found the effects to be similar. There is definetly no MDMA as the trip was neither emphatic nor euphoric. Fans of disassociatives   or opiates would find this pill so-so but the rest would be advised to steer clear.

Innocence where are you, havnt seen you in awhile
You are where I left my dreams behind
I long for you sweet embrace that washes away my tears
Tears I have shed searching for a child called happiness
From the back alleys of society to the depths of my soul
I have searched for love, compassion and kindness
Aided without a map or a helping hand
I plough the fields of meloncholy hoping to find a single grain
But all is lost for happiness is but a myth
Like the tooth fairy and all her friends
So I die a lonely death with no one with me but Sorrow
For she is with me... always

Earth is a boring place to be once you have seen the stars and have travelled to the inner depths of your soul. These wonderfull journeys have left me wanting more.... but now that I have returned with my two feet planted on the grounds of reality... I feel an emptiness like no other. Everyday seems to be a meaningless routine highlighted with sprinkles of hopelesness and self pity. How pathetic. I should be out preparing to go on journeys to strange lands filled with marvelous and totally different takes on reality. But all i am doing now is alternating between staring at the wall and empty space. How sad.

It's been a two months since I've been forcefully removed from the world I used to know and my chosen family whom I love. For once I found a place where I belonged with people who shared a common love and now those times are gone. What remains are photographs and memories of a life I used to love. Returning back to society at the starting line of the rat race is a difficult task for anyone whos tasted absolute bliss, euphoria and chemical love. My weekly escapades have led me to places I never knew existed and facilitated strong genuine friendships with people I now know as my brothers and sisters.
.....But we all need to face reality some day, right????

Oh, so thats what my dinner looks like with alchohol and stomach acids! I really feel like crap at the moment. I made the mistake of ingesting one too many slabs of Nurofen +(minus ibuprofen) and chasing it down with one too many bottles of beer. The mild sedation I get when I combine alchohol and codeine is but a distant memory and I'm left here lying on my bed with a splitting headache and a stomach bubbling with bodily acids. The moment my friends left my house, I rushed to the toilet for some cistern worshiping. At least I know that my body's reverse peristalsis still works just fine. It makes me wonder how bullimics do this everyday. Even with the analgesic effects, my throat still hurts like hell. I should limit myself to smaller ammounts of beer and codeine when combining rhe two next time. I guess I'm off to bed now and hopes my body forgives me for inflicting it with so much punishment in the last hour.

Wow, new stuff to try out....hmmm its always great to recieve new pharmaceuticals to try out. Todays item will be amiltriptyline- a tricyclic antidepressant. Sounds great so far... maybe i'll have one...yummy!
Its been over 2 hours and after a cone of quality salvia... I still dont feel any recreational value in this little blue pill..... its allright ..just heap on the alco and codeine. Thats it, now it feels better!
Back to my trusty codeine.... just that sleep is impossible but the alco should do it.....
Might as well go with another 10mg of amil...... just to give it another try. Insufflated maybe?!
Pharms just havent been doing it for me. My recent venture into benzos hasnt been looking all that promising. Temazepam is just too week. Maybe i'll need more in future. Anyone has any Nimetazepam by any chance or some Alprazolam....sigh* I guess i'm back to my trusty ol Codeine.... which has never let me down... same ole codeine.

Another week gone and its Friday once again. But this time its different, I wont be at Bass Station, neither will I be at Hard Kandy. So where will I be tonight?...... The answer is home..... my home.... shocking isnt it?!! But wait... the more perceptive amongst you will ask Why? Why would someone who visits his weekend institution religiously choose to stay at home this week. Is it because he fears for his health or has he experienced the inevitable..... has he grown sick of these chemically fuelled cha-cha sessions?

Its almost mid week once again and time for another edition of "the week that was". I experienced little to no comedown from my friday night escapades. This was because of my active decision to cut down on illicit substances. I had only one bikkie and it wasnt even one with a high MDMA content. The funny thing was I enjoyed myself thoroughly and although my whole body felt like jello mixed with tofu I had a shitload of fun. The absence of any stimulants and sleep depravation caused me to dance in 30 second shifts instead of my usual half hour ones. The company was fantastic, the music was good and to wind it all up, we had a walk on the beach appreciating the wonders of nature and sandflies *ouch*. Maybe the next step would be a chemical free weekend.

It's been Bass Station two weeks in a row now and it feels more and more like home now. The people there seem a whole lot friendlier than Kandy and they look like they are still grounded to reality and not in their own little world. Bass was fun, it had all the makings of a good night marred only by my friends no show. He didnt make it to Bass becasue he apparently had one too many shots of Bacardi 151. Anyways he made up for it by hitting Kandy with us at 8 in the morning. Which brings me to the point of my entry- Kandy is going down. The dancefloor was almost barren and the friendly atmosphere you find in hard dance clubs was nowhere to be found. It saddens me even more when I think about what the guest Djs (Organ Donors UK) impressions of the club where. This used to be such a nice place with friendlier people and more shufflers. Unless something is done soon, its gonna be Bass that will become my new home on Saturday mornings.